HIV and deepness

I've had many "firsts" in Africa.

The majority of my firsts could of happened in America but they happened here instead. For instance... My first time on a motorcycle.

My first time crashing on a motorcycle (yep, it happened and my mom is just finding out about it as she reads this)

My first time realizing what being an American actually means

My first time living out of my suitcase 

Okay it seemed like much more in my head...let's continue.

What I was getting at is Friday night was my first time going to a club. Could of happened in America, never did, so it happened in Africa. Of all places. The best part is you are really confused that clubs exist in Africa. The other best part is my mom is freaking out about how unsafe it was but lets be honest, we were as safe if not safer at this club then we would have been at one in America. (I'm starting to feel safer here then in America.) We all went as a group and were obviously the only sober ones yet the only ones dancing like cray cray. I love myself a good dance party and this my friends was more then a good dance party. I want to say I've never danced so hard in my life but I usually put my all into every dance party that occurs in my life. The highlight of the night is when I came home and puked for a good 3 hours straight and didn't end up going to bed until 5 in the morning. Yummmyyyy

The next morning I was having a sore body from dancing/ouch my stomach hurts from throwing up hangover and we had HIV testing the whole day! (that was a large sentence) We had a HUGE turn out. We thought only about 100 people would come...WRONGO, we had over 300 people show up!! Only 12 out of those 300 had HIV. I told this information to Richard all excited but he reminded me that it's sad that those 12 people have HIV. He's right. It's terrible. It was actually pretty sad. The worstest part is 2 out of those 12 people are our beading ladies! What are the chances? Slim. 

We had counselors there to talk to them after they got their results. I sat with one of them named Rose and she was so great. My job was to be the moral support to the ones that were HIV positive. How the heck do you tell an person with HIV that their life is going to be okay? You don't. You basically just tell them it's good that they are aware so they can be safe and more careful as they continue to live their life. Luckily the couple hours I was there with Rose there was only one person HIV positive. Before everyone got tested, they came to one of the counselors and give them their name and other random info. This one lady came to Rose to give her her info and decided to tell me how she couldn't pay for her children's school fees because she has so many children and her husband left her. The worst. I couldn't help but feel sorry for her. I tell her I am sorry and she continues on to get tested. Her daughter ended up being negative. The negatives were told to continue to practice safe sex and gave them a huge handful of condoms. The lady comes back to Rose to get her results and I find out she's positive. I didn't even end getting to tell her it was going to be okay and "it's good that she knows" because Rose didn't speak her tribal language. She could only understand it. I passed the "positive" information to the translator who took her to the other room to tell her the results. I never saw her reaction but I think it's better that I didn't. I asked Rose what the chances were of her daughter being negative when she was positive and she said the daughter is very lucky. Crazy stuff right?

How lucky are we to live in a country where HIV isn't a big deal? Every experience I have hear continuously blows my mind and makes me aware of how lucky I am. I can't believe how I live life in America after being here for 3 months. We have it so easy it's ridiculous. I can't even begin to explain how much being here has changed my view on myself and others and life in general. I came into this thinking I will be humbled and I am going to feel so blessed to live where I do and yada yada yada but it's so much more than that. Living in a different country and semi-living the way these people live changes you as a person. It's so hard to explain but I've learned so much about myself and what is really important/matters in life. I knew this whole trip was going to change me but I didn't know to what extent. I can't believe I even considered going home early. Now I don't want to leave. I feel like there is so much more to do and to learn. I just want this next month to go by as slowly as possible. I don't want to go back to real life and morph back into my annoying American ways. I'm a different person. I literally have changed and I love it. I love my life. I've said that before and I've meant it but I mean it even more now.

P.S. I'm bummed I don't have pictures, sorry about that.